{"id":382,"date":"2021-02-11T12:03:26","date_gmt":"2021-02-11T20:03:26","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.trustunlimited.com\/?p=382"},"modified":"2021-02-11T12:03:26","modified_gmt":"2021-02-11T20:03:26","slug":"trust-me-im-your-leader","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.trustunlimited.com\/trust-me-im-your-leader\/","title":{"rendered":"Trust me I\u2019m your leader ..??"},"content":{"rendered":"

One of the primary differentiating factors between good and great leaders is the ability to understand and build trust. The more senior a leadership role we take on, the less direct control we have over outcomes. We become more and more reliant on those who report to us for our own successes. In fact, at very senior levels, all of our goals and aspirations depend on the work of others.<\/span><\/p>\n

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Research and experience have repeatedly shown that higher trust levels within an organization lead to higher levels of employee engagement, organizational citizenship behaviours, profitability, and performance.\u00a0There is conclusive economic evidence that organizations with higher trust levels perform better.\u00a0In short, leaders who can build trust will run organizations that perform better and are more likely to be successful.<\/p>\n

In this article I will be reviewing the story of \u201cPat\u201d (not his real name), an executive I coached through various stages of his professional development. Pat\u2019s needs and skill sets changed over the course of his career, but elements of the need to build trust were always present.<\/p>\n

The Story of Pat<\/strong><\/p>\n

Pat was referred to me by another coaching client.\u00a0He was an upper mid-level manager and his team was underperforming.\u00a0When I first started working with Pat, he expressed extreme frustration that his direct reports seemed so listless and passive.\u00a0\u201cI can\u2019t get them to give any real feedback, offer up suggestions, or take any risks.\u00a0When I tell them about group and organizational priorities, they seem so slow to respond and indifferent.\u00a0I\u2019m also the last one to know when anything goes wrong.\u201d\u00a0Of course, when I heard this, being a trust expert, I immediately suspected this was a trust problem.\u00a0I decided to follow up by interviewing some of Pat\u2019s direct reports to see what their perspective was.<\/p>\n

It took time to get Pat\u2019s direct reports to open up, but when they did, they made a number of interesting comments:\u00a0\u201cThey tell us everything is top priority, which essentially means that nothing is.\u201d \u201cWith all of the cutbacks, I just try to keep my head down.\u201d\u00a0\u201cThere\u2019s no way I would push back on senior management or offer suggestions; I have no idea how they would respond.\u201d\u00a0\u201cThere are always new priorities being announced; if you wait a month or two it always goes away and a new priority gets announced.\u201d\u00a0These are all symptoms of a lack of trust in an organization.\u00a0A follow-up survey of Pat\u2019s team showed that there was indeed a lack of trust in the organization, and more specifically a lack of trust in Pat himself.<\/p>\n

One of the challenges I encounter most frequently is a fundamental lack of awareness around trust: what trust is, whom we trust, and who trusts us.\u00a0When I ask senior executives, \u201cWho trusts you?\u201d I\u2019ll often get a long awkward pause, followed by some variant of, \u201cHow on Earth would I know?\u201d\u00a0The answer to this question is found in the definition of trust.\u00a0Trust is the willingness to make yourself vulnerable to another.\u00a0So, if you are a leader, ask yourself how those you lead can make themselves vulnerable, and whether they do so.<\/p>\n

People are intrinsically vulnerable to their leaders, and can demonstrate trust by increasing that vulnerability in a number of ways.\u00a0Giving clear and honest upward feedback to someone who has the ability to make your life miserable, or even fire you, can be daunting, to say the least.\u00a0Telling your boss that Ted is goofing off, then finding out that Ted is your boss\u2019s drinking buddy, can quickly put your career in a tailspin.\u00a0Investing time and energy learning how to pursue \u201cnew priorities\u201d only to discover they\u2019ve changed and your split attention has led to you not completing other work to your boss\u2019s satisfaction isn\u2019t just frustrating, it can be career-limiting.\u00a0From the perspective of a subordinate, when things don\u2019t go as planned, it\u2019s usually not the leader who takes the spear; it\u2019s someone among the rank and file.<\/p>\n

One of my favourite academic articles is \u201cLearning through failure: the strategy of small losses,\u201d written by my friend and former advisor Sim Sitkin.\u00a0Sim points out that if people are pushing to the limits of their abilities, they should be making mistakes.\u00a0In part this is how we learn, grow and develop.\u00a0If employees aren\u2019t making mistakes it may mean that they are being overly cautious and conservative \u2013 something that would indicate an unwillingness to trust, to make themselves vulnerable to the repercussions of making those mistakes.<\/p>\n

When people decide to trust someone, or not, they ask themselves two fundamental questions.\u00a0How likely am I to be harmed (perceived uncertainty) and if I\u2019m harmed how badly will it hurt (perceived vulnerability).\u00a0Our perceptions of uncertainty and vulnerability combine to give us a level of perceived risk.\u00a0If our level of perceived risk is higher than the level of risk we are comfortable with we don\u2019t trust.\u00a0This means that if we feel really vulnerable then we can\u2019t handle too much uncertainty.\u00a0If we feel a lot of uncertainty then we can\u2019t handle very high levels of vulnerability.\u00a0Employees can feel, and indeed be, extremely vulnerable at work.\u00a0There is a lot at stake if they don\u2019t do well.\u00a0We often spend more time at work than we do in any place other than our homes.\u00a0We have friends and colleagues there, it forms a part of our identity, and it pays the bills.\u00a0Struggles at work, losing your job or watching those around you lose their jobs can provoke intense feelings of unease.<\/p>\n

Now what?<\/strong><\/p>\n

Pat struggled with the news that there was a trust problem with his subordinates, particularly the idea that they might not trust him.\u00a0The results of our survey were clear, but hard to accept; people generally tend to believe they are trustworthy and that others should trust them.\u00a0After all, they know the reasons for the things they do and believe that there are good reasons for the decisions they make.\u00a0They seldom consider the perspective of others who may be affected and may not be aware of the reasons behind the decisions.<\/p>\n

I wish that I could say that Pat was unique, or even rare, in his lack of awareness about how little his subordinates trusted him.\u00a0Despite the fact that trust is critical to the success of leaders in any organization, most, like Pat, often don\u2019t have a very clear idea about how much (or how little!) they are trusted.\u00a0Sim Sitkin, mentioned above, is Faculty Director of the Fuqua\/Coach K Center of Leadership and Ethics (COLE) at Duke University.\u00a0Based on self-report and survey data, one of the largest gaps COLE has found in their studies of organizations is the one between how much leaders believe they are trusted, and how much they actually are.<\/p>\n

Leaders aren\u2019t alone in overestimating how much they are trusted; we all tend to believe that we are trustworthy.\u00a0This may actually be one of the reasons that trust levels in our society have fallen so far.\u00a0There is a lack of trust in the world, but since we all think we ourselves are trustworthy, it\u2019s always someone else\u2019s problem.\u00a0And if it\u2019s someone else\u2019s problem, we tend not to take action.<\/p>\n

While leaders aren\u2019t alone in overestimating how much they are trusted, they may find it harder than others to gain an accurate picture.\u00a0As yet unpublished research by Tony Simons from the Cornell University School of Hotel Administration on top management teams suggests that all members of the team EXCEPT the leader have a very clear and consistent sense about how the team is doing.\u00a0The leader seems to be completely out of the loop in terms of how well the team is getting along and functioning.\u00a0Structural elements and power differences make others behave differently around the leader.\u00a0There is often also a reluctance to admit to the boss that the rest of the team can\u2019t figure out how to get along.<\/p>\n

The solution for Pat was to become more transparent with his thought processes.\u00a0Over time we worked on creating a story that was comfortable for Pat and that he could refer back to when he made decisions or took actions.\u00a0An example of this was Pat\u2019s public commitment to his subordinate\u2019s development.\u00a0This meant that when he gave them tough feedback it was clearly aimed at helping them improve.\u00a0Previously it was seen simply as him being mean or overly demanding.\u00a0When he followed up that feedback with training and coaching to help them get better in areas they needed to improve in the story was that he was investing time and energy in helping them get better.\u00a0Previously this had been seen as him micromanaging, nagging, and creating make work tasks. This transparency allowed Pat to systematically reduce the level of uncertainty that his people were experiencing in their interactions with him.\u00a0Follow-up surveys six months later showed a significant difference in how Pat\u2019s subordinates were feeling about him. \u00a0Team performance also began to dramatically improve.<\/p>\n

Pat, version 2.0<\/strong><\/p>\n

After adopting this new approach, Pat made great progress within his organization and was rapidly promoted.\u00a0There were a number of reasons for Pat\u2019s success.\u00a0He had become increasingly skilled at building relationships with subordinates, peers, and those he reported to.\u00a0Pat also worked very hard and consistently demonstrated strong technical skills throughout his career.\u00a0He had never met a problem he couldn\u2019t outwork.<\/p>\n

I was a bit shocked when I met with Pat 18 months after our original coaching sessions. He looked terrible.\u00a0He had gained weight, lost hair, and looked incredibly stressed and exhausted.\u00a0I asked him what was going on, and he said he was struggling to keep up.\u00a0As he had risen through the ranks, his span of control had expanded: he had more responsibilities and more people reporting to him.\u00a0He was running himself into the ground trying to oversee what everyone was doing, and attempting to keep up with the technical demands from a range of his direct reports.<\/p>\n

As our span of control gets broader, we become less and less able to do everything, or even oversee everything that is happening.\u00a0While it\u2019s possible to be very hands-on at lower levels of an organization, it becomes increasingly time-consuming to check everyone\u2019s work and micromanage people the higher we go.\u00a0Pat had become great at getting others to trust him, but he was still really struggling to trust others.<\/p>\n

As we move up the hierarchy, we are less and less able to rely on our technical competence to resolve problems.\u00a0With the rate that technology is changing, it seems unrealistic to expect leaders to be able to manage the issues of running an organization while maintaining technical expertise.\u00a0We eventually become overwhelmingly dependent on others for the success of the organization we are leading.\u00a0As our dependence on others increases, so does the need for strong interpersonal skills \u2013 and trust.<\/p>\n

Pat needed to realize that his people were going to make mistakes, and that was just part of their development.\u00a0He needed to start trusting his people by letting go of certain things and slowly building his own confidence in his people\u2019s abilities.\u00a0We moved forward by having Pat be conscious of letting small things go, clearly defining what success looked like, and working with Pat\u2019s subordinates to systematically build his trust with them.\u00a0It took some time, but Pat was able to make the transition to a more balanced life and became even more effective as a leader.<\/p>\n

Conclusion<\/strong><\/p>\n

The ability to understand others and build trust with them \u2013 in both directions \u2013 is one of the primary variables I\u2019ve found that differentiates between good and great leaders.\u00a0It\u2019s important not only to be trusted but also to be able to trust others.\u00a0The good news is that this is a skill that you can work on and develop over time.\u00a0The bad news is that not many leaders are actually aware enough to realize it\u2019s a problem, or something they should be working on.<\/p>\n

We all have the ability to build trust with others, though it does come more naturally to some than to others.\u00a0Trust building is a skill that we can all learn and we all have room to improve.\u00a0Leaders can take steps to become more aware of trust levels within their organization.\u00a0They can also take steps to improve the trust building skills that they have.<\/p>\n

Author<\/h3>\n

Dr. Darryl Stickel is a professor at the Luxembourg School of Business teaching in the MBA program and a variety of executive education programs. Darryl has a Ph.D. in Business from Duke University and has worked as a consultant with McKinsey & Company. His specialty is building trust. Darryl\u2019s Ph.D. thesis was entitled \u201cBuilding Trust in Hostile Environments\u201d.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

One of the primary differentiating factors between good and great leaders is the ability to understand and build trust. The more senior a leadership role we take on, the less direct control we have over outcomes. We become more and more reliant on those who report to us for our own successes. In fact, at…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[8,12,10],"tags":[],"acf":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.trustunlimited.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/382"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.trustunlimited.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.trustunlimited.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.trustunlimited.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.trustunlimited.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=382"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.trustunlimited.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/382\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.trustunlimited.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=382"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.trustunlimited.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=382"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.trustunlimited.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=382"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}